Pregnancy - I'm not scared, I'm terrified

January 15, 2018

EST. READING TIME: 2 minutes

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I am not scared of being a mom, the act of keeping a human alive and raising it to be a decent person sounds fun to me.

 

I am scared of the person I will become as a result of being a mom.

 

I am scared of how fast time seems to be flying and I am only 13 weeks pregnant!

I am scared of how my body is changing.

I am scared of being distracted from God.

I am scared of how busy being a mom will make me.

I am scared of how tired being a mom will make me.

I am scared of how my interactions with my husband will change.

 

 

I am scared of this express lane I seemed to have stepped on.

 

I am scared of my child going off to college and realizing that I am old.

 

I am scared and that is ok.

 

I don’t want to tie it all up into a pretty little bow of optimism, sunshine, and good vibes, today.

 

Today I want to leave this hanging out there a little bit…  allow things to feel uncomfortable.

 

This next stage of being a mom is going to be great, I know that, but just because I am heading into something exciting doesn’t mean that I need to skip over the fact that I am leaving another stage behind.

 

Time is passing. And it will only seem to fly by faster.

 

Becoming a mother is the final goodbye to my own childhood. Even in marriage you can still be two dumb kids doing pretty much whatever you want, but becoming a parent requires you to step into adulthood. I know that I can still be fun and childlike, but it is undeniable that I am no longer THE child… I have a child…. I am THE parent.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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